Sexual Abuse Therapy for Men in Ottawa and Across Ontario and Quebec

A confidential space for men to process sexual abuse and understand its lasting impact

Sexual abuse can leave you carrying a lot that is difficult to talk about. You may feel confused about what happened, question whether it was "really" abuse, or blame yourself for how you responded. You may also be dealing with anger, shame, fear, numbness, or difficulty trusting others.

Whether the experience happened recently or years ago, you don't have to deal with its impact on your own.

I offer trauma-focused psychotherapy for men who have experienced sexual abuse, providing a confidential and non-judgmental space to process what happened, understand your reactions, and begin moving forward in a way that feels right for you.

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Sexual abuse doesn't always look the way you expect

Sexual abuse can involve many different experiences, including:

Sexual contact without your consent
Being pressured, coerced, manipulated, or threatened into sexual activity
Being taken advantage of when you could not freely consent
Unwanted sexual touching or exposure
Sexual exploitation or trafficking
Sexual abuse by someone you knew, trusted, or depended on
Abuse within a relationship
Being exposed to sexual content or experiences without your consent

You may know exactly what happened, or you may still be trying to make sense of it.

You don't have to be certain about how to label your experience before seeking support.

You might be experiencing...

After the experience

Shock, confusion, anger, fear, or numbness
Shame or self-blame
Questioning whether you could have done something differently
Feeling responsible for what happened
Trouble sleeping or feeling constantly on edge
Intrusive memories, images, or thoughts
Avoiding people, places, situations, or intimacy that remind you of what happened
Feeling disconnected from yourself or your body
Difficulty trusting other people

When it affects your relationships or sexuality

Difficulty feeling safe with touch or intimacy
Feeling disconnected or overwhelmed during sex
Changes in sexual desire
Frequently seeking sex, pornography, masturbation, or sexual validation ; or avoiding sex
Using sex as a way to cope with difficult emotions or regain a sense of control
Difficulty with arousal or orgasm
Feeling confused about what you want sexually
Difficulty communicating your needs or boundaries
Feeling distant from your partner or struggling to let someone get close
Shame or discomfort around your sexuality

You don't need to relate to all of these. Sexual abuse affects everyone differently, and your response does not define what happened to you.

How we can work together

Therapy can give you space to make sense of the experience and understand what may be happening beneath your reactions.

Together, we may explore:

Processing memories and emotions connected to the abuse
Reducing shame and self-blame
Understanding fear, anger, numbness, or other reactions
Rebuilding a sense of safety and control
Reconnecting with your body
Developing and communicating boundaries
Rebuilding trust in yourself and others
Understanding how the experience may be affecting sexuality and intimacy
Finding healthier ways to cope with difficult emotions
Reconnecting with the parts of yourself that may feel changed by what happened

Valérie Boisvert, M.E.d, R.P., integrates EMDR and IFS/parts work, choosing approaches based on your needs, goals, and comfort level.

If you're struggling specifically with the effects of the experience on your sexuality or intimate relationships, Sex Therapy may also be part of your therapeutic work.

You don't have to tell me everything

You don't have to describe every detail of what happened in order to begin therapy.

You are always in control of what you choose to share. We can start with what you're experiencing now and gradually explore what happened when, and if, it feels right for you.

There is no pressure to tell your story in a particular way. You don't need to have all the answers before reaching out.

What happened was not your fault

People who experience sexual abuse can carry a lot of shame and self-doubt, especially when they froze, went along with something, couldn't stop what was happening, or responded in a way they didn't expect.

Your response was not consent.

You don't have to minimize what happened because you didn't fight back, because you knew the person, because you were in a relationship with them, or because part of the experience felt confusing.

Therapy can be a space to work through those questions without judgment.

LEARN MORE ABOUT SEX THERAPY

LEARN MORE ABOUT EMDR

LEARN MORE ABOUT IFS

You don't have to let the experience define you

Sexual abuse can affect how you see yourself, your body, your relationships, and your sexuality. But what happened to you does not have to determine who you are or what your future relationships and intimacy look like.

Therapy can help you process what you've been carrying, reconnect with yourself, and move toward greater choice, confidence, and a sense of control over your life and sexuality.

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Ready to take the next step?

If you're wondering whether therapy could be helpful, we can start with a free 20-minute consultation. You can ask questions, share as much or as little as you're comfortable with, and get a sense of whether my approach feels like a good fit.

Psychotherapy is available in English and French, in person in Ottawa and virtually across Ontario and Quebec.